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Chaos Angel Spanner — Chapter 8: Rip Her to Shreds
Part 2: Freddy’s Revenge (Revision 3)
14 september 2014.
coffee shop. Next to the ferry terminal, there is a Starbucks. The girls of Sexy Team meet there before they catch the bus to school. Unfortunately, this particular Starbucks happens to be the place Will Becket gets his morning coffee. “And what is this all about, young ladies?” he asks.
Shira answers, “Suicide prevention. We have a close friend we’re trying to save, and the meds aren’t doing much to help.”
“I hope my nieces aren’t involved in this.”
“If they are, they’d better help us help her, or they’ll have a classmate’s suicide to feel guilty about for the rest of their lives.”
“You girls had better hope you’re right.” He leaves their corner and goes out the door on his way back to base.
“She absolutely hasn’t been herself the last couple days,” says Polly.
“She’s showing obvious signs of post-traumatic stress,” says Jennifer. “By now it should be obvious she’s been raped.”
Polly gasps, “Oh my god that’s
horrible!”
“It doesn’t help that all the paparazzi in the world came to good ol’ Bummertown to rape her some more,” Shira adds.
Harumi asks, “So what do we do to save her?”
“Detective work. Jen, you up to it?”
Jennifer raises a thumbs-up. “Count me in!”
school. Before class: Charmian fervently denies ordering anything that horrible to Shira (or that she’s jealous of Leila, but that’s neither here nor there, apparently). Kelly says Leila wasn”t tough enough. Bart claims rape is what cowards do. Lucy insinuates that Leila deserved it for being such an immoral slut, to which Shira replies, “She just looks like one to you. I’m the real thing, baby,” in response to which Lucy flees screaming. Christian also denies anything, leading Jennifer to think Leila is to her an obstacle getting in the way between her and her beloved Robert. Scotty sneers at sex criminals and says whoever did this to Leila should be hanged by their man parts.
Shira asks, “Nothing?” Jennifer shrugs. “Nothing.” Fiona sighs in despair. They hug her.
Period one: Mr Smith calls her Leela again. The mean girls chant “Leela! Leela! Leela!” Shira laughs at them and demands, “Who let the first graders in?” Kelly gasps in offense and storms out.
Period two: Mr Jones picks yet another fight with Jennifer over evolution. He preaches at her that she is wrong; she replies with a condescending long-winded lecture in which she starts making fun of him by the end. Even barely over two weeks in, the students are coming to the conclusion that he really is an ignorant fool wedded to a dead faith. This time, once he starts ranting about Heaven and Hell, Leila sighs in frustration, stands up, declares “Don’t be a fool. There is no afterlife,” and leaves. Jennifer smiles, says, “What she said,” and follows her out to give her a hug.
Period three: Mrs Turnipseed tries yet again to larn y’all Anglish, but all her blockheaded students (and especially the tutors) persist in speaking some form of the Queen’s English. In frustration, Jennifer starts speaking like a certain character on
The Fat Albert Show who puts the consonant “B” into every word he speaks, making the teacher fume and the students laugh. But Leila suddenly goes into a crying phase and leaves.
School clinic: “We’re gonna have to put her under sedation,” says the school nurse. Shira signals Rob and Fiona to remain silent and says, “You mean depressants? Isn’t she depressed enough? You should know she’s had past problems with depressants.” The nurse asks, “And who’s so certain about that?” Shira answers, “Merely every single celebrity watcher in the Empire.”
Shira’s apartment. Sexy Team have a post-school meeting around the living-room coffee table. The mood is grim. “At this rate,” says Shira, “
“All I see is the mean girls doing the same old mean girl stuff they’ve been doing to us since day one,” Polly comments. “She’s survived it perfectly well before. What’s gotten into her this time?”
“Post-traumatic stress,” Jennifer answers. “Like I said, I’m certain she’s been raped. Those antidepressants she’s been taking can’t help things any. Whether you stay on ’em or quit, one of the side effects is suicide.”
“Oh, great...”
“So far, we’ve got no leverage. What can we use against ’em?”
“Hmmm.” Shira looks around idly, trying to think. Suddenly her attention is drawn by the sleeping Furby. “I think I’ve got an idea.”
15 september 2014.
ferry terminal. Stan Green is taking a leak in the lower-level men’s restroom when Shira bursts in, Furby perched on her shoulder. “Yeek!” he squeaks as he hastes to hide his small and still-dripping penis. Shira laughs.
“
What the hell are you
doing here?!”
“I thought you guys were Straightedge, Stan.”
“
What? Are you
stupid? We just say No!”
“I’m talking about
steroids.”
Stan looks at her funny, then smugly smirks at her. “
That’s no ‘drug,’ if that’s what you’re talking about. It’s the very essence of manhood itself!”
Shira gives him her “gotcha” smile. “Well, I caught you
selling this quote-unquote ‘man essence.’ Take a look.” She whips out her phone, holds it in front of Stan’s face, and plays the surveillance video of him and Falconer. Stan’s jaw drops and his eyes go wide.
“You
bitch!” he screams. He tries to knock the phone out of her hand with his huge fist, unconscious of the urine still squirting wildly out of his exposed penis. She pulls back the phone; he punches air.
Shira skips out of the men’s room laughing. “Die young, die strong, Dianabol!” she taunts.
“See ya!” adds Freddy as she leaves. “Wouldn’t wanna be ya!”
school. Shira brings Freddy with her. The Furby is an extremely exotic character and becomes hugely popular among her fellow students. But not everybody likes Freddy. Bart and Charmian put a contract out on it. Jocks and mean girls try to destroy it while Shira’s not looking, only to find that
somebody’s always looking.
principal’s office. “I want you to get that thing out of here at once,” says an obviously creeped-out Principal.
“You mean you can’t take being insulted by a
toy? I
so feel sorry for you, Mr Principal.” She leaves with her Furby.
“Loser,” says Freddy.
lunch. As Shira stands in line to check out a book in the library, Polly taps her shoulder. “Where’s Leila? Everybody’s worried about her.”
“I don’t know,” Shira answers. “I haven’t seen her in class today. Maybe the clinic?”
Suddenly Beck bursts in, holding his groin and bleeding from the nose. “Fuckin’ faggot! I didn’t fuckin’ do anything to your fuckin’ whore sister!”
Rob follows him in. “No F-bombs in the library, punk. And stop lying.” He grabs Beck by the collar and pulls him toward the door.
Beck struggles to break Rob’s grip. “Lemme go, you mmf mff mmmm-mmm—” Shira crams her scarf in his mouth.
“Rob! What happened to Leila?”
Rob maneuvers Beck into a stranglehold. “Seems our Valiant friends here helped the brother of one of ’em rape her. I overheard a couple of ’em bragging about it.”
“Well! Did they say where?”
“Dope drop in Forest Lake Park.”
Shira takes out her phone. “You mean where I set up a camera to catch Bart’s big brother sell illegal steroids to the Major, the football coach, or both?”
Beck gasps in horror, goes, limp, and squeaks. Shira takes her scarf out of his mouth. “We didn’t do anything to her! Honest!”
Shira flashes him a cockeyed, narrow-eyed smirk that says,
I’ve got you now, baka. She redirects her attention to the phone and calls up the video app. “You know, you can lie all you want, but the camera never does.” She grins wickedly at him. “I’ve got the goods on Falconer and Mobley already. If I
did catch you date raping Leila, your little indulgence in malicious pleasure just gave me the means to destroy you and your entire team.” She puts her phone back in its case and re-ties her scarf around her neck. “In other words, your asses are mine. Now tell me, who was that guy you sold the drugs to?”
Beck stands there with his mouth wide open, unable to speak. Rob says, “His name is Oliver Thorwald.”
“You mean the son of that killer oligarch who got himself blown up by one of my deliveries two weeks ago?”
“Yeah, him. Big smoke Corporate with a billionaire daddy who got blown up couple weeks ago.”
“Lemme guess: he’s got it in for me, and he thinks the slightly less rich psychopaths of Valiant Team can help him get rid of me. Y’know, Becky, you guys just took one step closer to a Gang Rules vendetta.”
In panic Beck blurts, “I don’t know about Rex, but I promise I won’t say a word! Your word is my command! I’ll even get Ollie’s ass for you!”
“Oh, don’t bother right now.” She grabs Beck’s collar, pulls him close, and warns, “But if anything bad happens to Leila... well, you know.” She lets go. He dashes out of the library as fast as he can.
“Lamer,” says Freddy.
period 2. Mr. Jones gets into Jennifer’s face. “There
ain’t no such thing as quote-unquote evolution!” he snarls. “So explain to me why there’s still apes!”
Jennifer rises out of her seat and smiles. “It’s called
speciation,” she lectures, “defined as the emergence of new species out of old ones. When a group of one species is isolated from the rest of its species, whether in another place or a separate ecological niche, it eventually becomes unable to breed with its old species, and thus becomes a new species. It’s what Darwin wanted to explain: how did one South American finch species turn into so many when it reached the Galápagos? Speciation is also why the Neanderthals coexisted with us Cro-Magnon humans for so long without interbreeding until they did. If you can’t accept this fact, you don’t believe in reality.”
“Reality’s just a liberal prejudice, young lady.”
“If you believe that, then, objectively speaking, I’m afraid your revolution has no future.”
“And what makes you think that?”
“Entropy.” She flounces away like a Fleer sister, right out the door.
Freddy says, “Ding ding ding!”
lunch. Shira and Jennifer spot Kelly and Debbie failing to hide the fact that they’re pulling some prank, from the “Hi! I’m a spy!” way they’re running to the malicious giggles. They notice the two are carrying some of Leila’s things. They look at each other. “Gaslighting?” asks Jennifer.
“Perfect mark for it,” says Shira.
16 september 2014.
hallway. Shira finds Charmian blackmailing Leila. Charmian suddenly feels a presence and turns to find Shira frowning at her, hands on hips. “And what is
that supposed to be?”
“This,” Shira replies, “is my spy. You and your gang had better behave in his presence, ’cuz he can see for miles and miles. Now stop picking on Leila and go to class.”
Charmian glares at her for a second, then harrumphs and flounces away. Shira looks at Leila with concern and places her hand gently on her tear-soaked, mascara-smeared cheek. “Leila, what happened?”
Leila shakes her head violently and runs away sobbing. A chill comes over Shira.
period 1. Mr Smith takes roll call. When he calls off “Leela Shelley,” Leila gets up, sighs in despair at his incurable cluelessness, and leaves for the door.
“‘Leela, Leela, Leela, Leela’ — stop being so childish, old man.” Leila shoots a murderous glare at the mean girls, then leaves the classroom, making sure to slam the door.
Jennifer whispers, “Whatever it is they did to Leila, she’s not taking it well, to say the least.”
Shira stares forward grimly. “If Rob’s right, then it’s about time we knock off some Tournament Leaders.”
school clinic. As soon as Shira sits down, the smiling nurse shows her some packages of Ritalin and says, “It looks like the pharmaceutical company’s sent us a bunch of extras yet again. Could you, like, take ’em off our hands? You can always jew me down if you like.” She winks.
Annoyed, Shira sighs. “You should know, I’ve got so much adrenaline in my system, I don’t need that kind of stuff. So I’d probably sell it for a big markup on the black market. But I could make an even bigger profit by turning you in to the authorities for a hefty bounty.” She leans toward the nurse seductively. “However, if you sleep with me, I won’t say a word.” She grins.
The nurse’s eyes open wide in shock. She strains to smile. “What if I tell the Principal you’re sexually harrassing me?”
“Then I’ll tell the police you’re dealing drugs.” Shira winks.
The smile disappears. “Oh,” the nurse says weakly.
“Lame,” says Freddy.
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[
Revision 2, 7/17/11: Unedited from the first draft.]
[
Revision 3, 10/14/11: Scenes dated up to 9/16/14 moved here from 8.3, new scenes dated 9/14/14 and later added, other scenes expanded, Leila added to most scenes and foregrounded, and continuity errors corrected. Original post intro (apologizing for posting it late and promising a Third Revision) removed.]
[
Revision 3.1, 10/22/11: Edited to fit revised Third Revision continuity.]
