Sunday, August 26, 2012

Spanner 7.5: Patriot Day

...from previous

Chaos Angel Spanner — Chapter 7: Love Missile
Part 5: Patriot Day (Final Revision)

11 september 2014.
Naked and helpless, Leila runs till suddenly she can no longer move. She looks down to find her feet merging with the blackened ground, and the blackness is moving up her body. Out of the blackness of darkness comes a monster. It dwarfs her, makes her insignificant, tries to pick her up and eat her.

Shira hits it with a mighty punch. It screams in pain with the voice of Oliver Thorwald. The pain shrinks it into insignificance. Shira laughs at it. Leila holds onto her for dear life and screams—

Seductive Shira dances nude, dangerously close, to taunt Thorwald. In his face she sways her buttocks breasts cunt close enough to kiss—yet there’s a Repulse between her body and his desire: he can never ever touch her. She torments him with the tortures of Tantalus. Softly seductively yet defiantly she sings:
I know what you want,
and you can’t have it.
I know what you want,
and I’m gonna take it.
He is in Hell, and she is his demon.

warehouse, bangor. He wakes up panting hard, his pajamas drenched in sweat. He is unaccustomed to such spartan surroundings, but he has no choice but to lay low while emergency reconstruction goes on at the penthouse. Mina said this abandoned warehouse on the edge of Biotron property would suffice.

Humiliation turns to rage; his muscles tighten hard, his teeth grind. “Fucking bitch. First she kills Dad, now she rapes my dreams.” He throws the lamp beside him across them room; its destruction plunges the windowless room into blackness. “Shit!

mudlark house. Willa Richter-Thomas summons the leaders of Bangor High’s opposition for an emergency meeting. From the Teachers Guild dissidents: Hope Reston, Dave Whitmer, Sally Hatfield, Kitty Carlisle, Christine Jordan, Sylvia Plame, Eugene Fletcher, Yasmin Khoury, and Ada Paulette Wintergreen. From the Student Union: Karen Kubota, Lorelei Straight, Courtney Richter-Thomas, Sana Ibrahim, Lyssa Watkins, Charlene “Chuck” Johnson, Don Vasquez, and Lorine Kelly. From Team Bremelo: Shira Thomas, Connor and Jennifer Blair, Brandi Quinn, Cory Belmont, Rob Shelley, Polly Parker, and Kio Marques. The absence of Colette Rosewater overshadows the meeting. Willa surveys them like a general. “The Patriots come at sundown. Are the fireworks ready?”

Kio replies, “The Indian tribes came through.” Several girls giggle.

“All the firecracker emplacements are in place,” Connor adds.

Polly’s voice trembles with worry. “I don’t know about this. You’d think Echelon woulda sniffed us out already.”

Shira grins and pats her on the shoulder. “Not to worry, Polly darling. Last night its eyes were on the paparazzi riots.”

Willa smiles. “We’re prepared for tonight. Now our first threat is SPEC and its proxies.”

“They want us to surrender without a fight,” says Jennifer.

“We can’t give up,” says Karen. “We can’t allow ’em to win.”

“This is a Challenge,” says Shira. “Let’s throw it back in their faces.”

“We gotta do this, no matter what,” says Cory.

“For all the victims of the Revolution,” says Connor.

“For Colette,” says Kio.

In unison, they all raise their voices and fists: “For Colette!”

holy city. Thirteen years ago today, the cult Al-Qaeda attempted to transform itself into a superpower by using hijackers armed with box cutters to destroy the World Trade Center and punch a hole in the Pentagon. The civilians have not been remembered. The full name of this holy day is the Day of the Patriot Martyrs—the martyrs in question are not the victims of the 9/11 terror attacks, but the revolutionary militants who offered their lives in blood sacrifice to Jesus America by dying for the Conservative Revolution. Cult fuhrer Osama bin Laden, self-proclaimed Messiah of the End Times, fell to Will Becket’s fangs the previous March. The Caliphate his cult so wantonly murdered to establish was actually created by the Conservative Revolution.

The High Holy Days of the American Religion are: Presidents’ Day, Veterans’ Day, Independence Day, Revolution Day, Restoration Day, Memorial Day—and today. The Patriot militants protect their Nation by assaulting the “Un-Americans” whose existence they believe desecrates the Nation. For the Caliphate is the body of Satan, and all who do not worship Jesus America by definition belong to him.

Today the Party celebrates the revolutionary overthrow of the People and the freedom of the State, beginning as always with a massive military parade through the vast expanse of Dominion Square that bisects the arcology to intimidate the world with the largest military force in history. A million soldiers goosestep past the platform and give the legionary salute to President Biff Thompson of President Goldman Sachs & Company, Vice President Sarah Palin, Dictel Corporation CEO Tom Becket, COPCO CEO Brendan Sparks, Defense Secretary Oliver North, Secretary of State John Bolton, and Homeland Security Secretary Henry Becket, who reply by holding up their right hands in the classic salute beloved of tyrants since Stalin. In the expensive exclusive luxury view boxes above, countless Corporates break open countless champagne bottles and drink deep to celebrate their supremacy. Michael Bay directs this gigantic pageant of revolution with spectacle and bombast intended to surpass Riefenstahl and Speer. But unlike Adolf Hitler, superstar, the true producer hides far back in the wings. Richard Becket, Chairman of the United Corporations, corporate owners of the Empire, looks upon the video feeds from the control room in Party headquarters, and pronounces it good.

homeroom. Vernon Falkner, homeroom teacher #6, wears the uniform of the Party’s Patriot militia. Unlike his late comrade Mark Bernkastel, he is no Knight. Still, the mere presence of a Revolutionary militant makes the atmosphere unbearably tense. He rages in Shira’s face. Shira takes the verbal abuse with eerie calm and an ironic smile. “What is this doing here? The inferior races are commanded by God to serve His Race as Himself, in fear and trembling! Girls shouldn’t be in school anyway! They should serve the Race in marriage, submission, and perpetuation of the Race!”

“Are you willing to back that up?” taunts Jennifer. “With murder? Over and over and over? Your comrade the Blade Knight was.” The smile on her face belies the Challenge in her eyes. The intensity of her stare makes Falkner flinch.

No one else dares make a sound.

dictel stadium. Junior Patriots, Moral Enforcers, and COPCO agents herd all the students in for the Patriot Day assembly, attendance mandatory. After the National Anthem, during which the “inferiors” salute the giant Imperial Star-and-Stripes out of fear of being immediately beaten up by the zealous Party faithful, the marching band trace intricate patterns on the field while playing patriotic songs as the drill team run about carrying the Star-and-Stripes, the Party Stars-and-Bars, the yellow-on-red triple-cross Church of America banner, the gold-on-green Dollar Sign representing Corporatism, and the silver-on-black medieval-knight emblem of the Bangor Crusaders. The armoured and mantled school mascot rides onto the field on his dancing horse.

When they’re done, they evacuate the field like a tsunami and trucks drive on to assemble the platform with instruments, lights, sound system, and backup band. The announcer booms, “Now let’s sing the RE-VO-LU-SHUUUNNN!”, the crowd in the stands cheer, the loud Patriot Metal begins its thunderous oppression, the faithful stand with hands held up to glossolate, and the first of many manly singers styling Cowboy, Scotty Walker, sings against the vanished liberals as if Soviet Communism were still an existential threat. Scotty can’t sing, but that doesn’t matter; all the Party wants is earnest faith.

Most of Team Bremelo have taken their usual position high up in the stands above the emo losers. But the Blairs and Shelleys are pale enough to pass for American, so they were able to claim front-row fifty-yard-line seats. Leila complains, “This thong itches.”

Jennifer pats her on the back. “Patience, darling. You can always take it off in the Doghouse.

“The music’s got an awful lot of sameness to it,” muses Rob.

Fiona asks, “Is it their house style?”

“They don’t think about it,” says Connor, “they just plagiarize every rock and country star ever, including each other.”

Jennifer shushes them. “Almost time!”

The steel guitarist ends his solo, Scotty tries to sing the final verse, and when Jennifer gives the signal they make their move: they stand up and turn around, the boys drop their trousers and the girls raise their skirts to reveal the message taped on their exposed behinds:


Scotty interrupts his song to let out a loud lusty scream.

holy city. One after the other, the Patriot Metal Superstars take the stage to sing songs of revolutionary rage with video parables by John Byrne and Frank Miller and explosions by the Michael Bay pyrotechincians: Ted Nugent, Toby Keith, Tom E. Breydon, Dave “Megadeth” Mustaine, Ultimate Warrior, Hank Williams Jr., Jeremiah Light, Darryl Kyle, Kid Rock, Byron Scofield: Rockers whose souls Jesus America took into captivity. Shepherd Gallagher wields the pneumatic sledgehammer upon the head of a Muslim, offered in sacrifice to Jesus America as Muslims offer sheep and infidels to the Demiurge; the faithful lick the blood and brains off themselves in the ecstasy of pure faith. At last, the pulpit is wheeled in and the elderly Supreme Shepherd Oswald T. Mobley shambles toward it escorted by his favored one, Princess Drusilla Becket Pernell. It is she who will preside over the sacred marriage of Vice President Sarah Palin.

Scofield and Light hold up Shepherd Mobley before the pulpit. He prounounces: “My fellow Americans, we are gathered here today to witness the binding of the Vice President of Our Nation in sacred marriage, so mote it be.” He can say no more, so he accepts the offering of cheers from the faithful, stands aside, and holds the Book of America, supported by Scofield and Light.

Drusilla and the Vice President stand facing each other in front of the podium, raise their right hands, and place their left hands on the Book of America. Drusilla initiates the ritual by asking her: “Do you take your new husband as your sovereign lord and master, to serve him in fear and trembling and utter submission, so mote it be?”

“I do!”

“In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Nation, I pronounce you—the Bride of God—Sarah AMERICA!

And the new husband of Vice President Sarah AMERICA! rises behind them, a giant figure with Jesus’ beard and thorny crown and the red-white-and-blue regalia of Uncle Sam, rises high above the assembled faithful, above even the fortresslike buildings of Holy City, to his full nine-hundred-foot height. Sarah AMERICA! faints into Drusilla’s arms, slain in the spirit. The masses of the faithful raise their arms in the legionary salute and scream their worship in the Unknown Tongue. And above them all, nine hundred feet tall, stands her husband, the deified Nation, the Second Coming of Christ, Jesus America.

biotron. Dr. Mina Tatsumi takes her seat in the chairman’s throne, flanked at the boardroom table by her faithful assistants Eri Ejimoto and Saya Saionji. Eri is busy with a phone call in Japanese from her panicked son Akane. Then a call comes in on Dr. Tatsumi’s own phone. Marshall Brinkman. She nearly throws the phone on the ground. “Oliver! you backstabbing bitch!” Saya looks at her with worry. She restrains her temper, catches her breath, signals Saya to make a call of her own, and takes the call from Brinkman. “Hello?”

“Dr. Mina Tatsumi?”

“This is she.”

“My client Mr. Thorwald wishes me to inform you that he has decided to exercise his option to take full ownership of his company. We have sent the papers today. Happy Patriot Day.” He cuts the call abruptly.

It takes a mighty effort of will for Dr. Tatsumi to restrain herself from throwing her phone across the boardroom. The effort is successful. She gently places her phone on the table in front of her.

She takes the phone from Saya. Brian Mason is a charmingly ruthless young Australian hotshot she headhunted from Yoyodyne legal. “How may I help you, Doctor?”

“Oliver’s just made his move.”

“Anything I need to know?”

“He hired Marshall Brinkman.”

“I’m on it right away.” He ends the call.

She looks at Eri and Saya. The silence is deafening. Saya breaks it. “You should have known you couldn’t trust him.”

“He wants a war? I’ll give him one, and his precious Nation too.”

holy city. In unison, Light and Scofield proclaim: “We pronounce you the Bride of God!”

Drusilla throws out her arms in triumph and exults, “I am Drusilla AMERICA!” The deafening cheers of the faithful quickly turn to glossolalia.

bremerton. Willa Richter-Thomas holds a press conference in front of Harborside Plaza’s famous dancing fountain to laugh at Chairman Becket’s request for her impressive genetic material. “Dream on, Dick.”

Shawna AMERICA! issues Willa via Fox News a public Challenge to a pistol duel. Willa sends her a video in which she demonstrates her excellent marksmanship with 9mm pistol, sniper rifle, and longbow. Shawna AMERICA! withdraws her challenge.

las vegas. In a run-down Presleyan church nestled among decaying giant casinos, a very drunken Elvis marries the deranged drummer of the hate metal band Gang to the Devil. He announces his new married name to the “metal militia”: Barney SATAN!

bangor high. The Junior Patriots riot. They fling books, food, trash, anything they can find. Possessed by revolutionary frenzy they attack anyone they deem politically incorrect. They steal tear gas from the hapless security guards and fling it around with abandon. Shira triggers the fire alarm to force the students to evacuate the school.

Chief Mobley refuses to stop the riot. He’s in the principal’s office enjoying it along with the principals.

detention. Team Bremelo huddle together in the middle of the cell. Brandi snorts in disgust. “So they’re blaming us for their riot?”

“Yep,” says Shira. “They’re blameless by definition, so somebody’s gotta take the blame, and we’re the challengers.”

Kio throws up his hands. “Why does the Major always have it in for us?”

“Honey Bunny hates getting pwned,” says Cory.

Shira grins. “Sore loser. Speaking of pwnage, I left Honey Bunny a surprise on her iPhone.”

“C’mon, people,” exhorts team leader Karen. “We gotta stick together and fight this injustice.”

“Yes, den mother,” whimper Cory and Kio together.

“Karen’s right,” says Shira. “As the great American revolutionary Ben Franklin once said, ‘We must all hang together, or we’ll all hang separately.’”

Polly glares at the Blairs and Shelleys. “Then why did you have to pull that number on us?”

Gleefully they answer: “Somebody had to!”

dictel park. Backed by a small horde of raging Patriots and Moral Enforcers, Team Valiant invade the Bangor underworld. At first the gangs send an army of flesh-eating Deads; inflamed and powered by holy hatred, the invaders burn them with fireworks and rip them to shreds. Wielding their baseball bats like mighty swords, they charge screaming into the savage hordes of gangsters. They throw rocks and M-80s and tear gas. They fire fireworks in all directions, setting trees and the Dictel Towers themselves on fire. Through the vicious gangster hordes the Junior Patriots advance on the day consecrated to their faction.

The fire department refuses to come out of fear of attack from both sides. Chief Becket of COPCO Seattle and his Bangor section chief Mobley are confident the Junior Patriots will prevail. The battle continues late into the night as Dictel Park burns.

mudlark house. “Be careful,” Will Becket had warned. But his warning fell on deaf ears. Twenty Patriots maddened by their love for Jesus America charge carelessly like mad bulls over the fence, through the shrubbery, and into Shira’s trap. Four long strings of M-80s go off around them, sounding as if a artillery barrage were pounding the north shore of Kitsap Lake. Minutemen and Moral Enforcers scream and shut their ears.

The rockets’ red glare betrays the position of the powerboats swarming up the lake. Caught unprepared by the surprise assault, the waterborne Patriots scramble to escape the bombs bursting in air and reach their fireworks. The Bremeloes carry their impromptu barricades and bazookas to the shore and fire at the boats. Boats catch fire, fireworks explode, boats sink, Patriots flee for their lives, flags burn...

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Copyright © 2012 Dennis Jernberg. Some rights reserved.
Creative Commons License

[Revision 4 Final, 8/26/12: Originally 7.6 in Revisions 2 and 3 and the bulk of Chapter 7 Revision 1. Some scenes revised for Fourth Revision continuity.]

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