Saturday, July 30, 2011

Spanner 10.1: Song for Minty

Note: Shira mentions something called “50/90.” That’s short for 50 Songs in 90 Days, a NaNoWriMo-inspired yearly contest which you try to win by, well, writing 50 songs in 90 days, starting on July 4.

...from previous

Chaos Angel Spanner — Chapter 10: Fashion Meltdown
Part 1: Song for Minty (Revision 3)

Fashion springs from absolute necessity,
unbounded by the constraints of conscience, mercy, pity...

24 september 2014.
tour bus.
Minty Fresh screams. Her manager and her many handlers race to her sleeping compartment. They find her fully dressed, staring angrily at her laptop, listening to a song being strummed on an acoustic guitar in a distinctly non-acoustic style. The singer’s voice: unmistakably that of Shira Thomas.

“What’s wrong?” asks the manager.

“I hate that woman!” rages Minty, “hate her, hate her! We’re making a stop in Bremerton so I can show her who’s the real star around here.”

“No you can’t—”

“Shira Thomas is openly lusting after me. Do you want her to keep insulting me without any consequences? You do what I say. I’ll beat that bitch at her own game.”

The manager sighs. “If you say so, Minty. But you can’t say we didn’t warn you.” The bus makes the detour off I-5 at the Bremerton exit in Tacoma.

technosphere. Posted by LocaFantoma99 to MyTube on 24 September 2014 at 6:00 a.m.:
[Shira is wearing: parti-colored feathered headdress that makes her hair stick up; short blue and gold matador jacket, open; black bustier.]

I know you’re asking the question, “Will she or won’t she?” [grins evilly] Molest Minty Fresh on camera, that is. Yes, yuri fangirls, I’ve been reading your comments. No, I won’t do Minty on MyTube. Sorry to disappoint you, fangirls. But don’t flame me! I’ve got the consolation prize right here. It’s a song I wrote during 50/90 just for her. Here it is! [winks wickedly]

[She reaches back to pick up her left-handed acoustic guitar and straps it on as she turns forward again. The camera pulls back to show that she is wearing a “Catholic schoolgirl” themed microskirt and fishnet pantyhose. She strums the opening chords enthusiastically and dances with the funky song.]

She’s the hot pop idol on the Internet
She’s so damn pretty she makes me sweat
I’m so obsessed I blew my game
And Minty Fresh is her name

Minty is the teen queen of my dreams
She’s so pretty she makes me scream
I wanna get right into her flesh
I wanna make love to Minty Fresh

I’ll make sweet love when the sun is bright
I’ll love her harder in the dark of night
I’ll love her and love her till she exclaims
And then I’ll scream out her name

Minty is the teen queen of my dreams
I wanna love her hard and make her scream
I wanna bite her butt and suck her breast
I wanna make love to Minty Fresh

She sings those songs so sweet
She makes me break down and cry
Sweet agony of defeat
But I can’t lie
She makes me fly

Her songs make her sound so innocent
But she knows how much she makes me wet
She’s so hot she ignites my flame
And Minty Fresh is her name

Minty is the teen queen of my dreams
I want her so bad she makes me cream
I’m the only one who can do her best
I’m gonna make love to Minty Fresh

[She extends the final chord into a full Rock Ending, then blows a kiss at the camera.]

Mwah!
Leila’s house. The Governor tries to call his wayward granddaughter. He gets her mother. Taylor says, “What do you want, old man?”

“I want your eldest daughter on the line, right now.”

“Sorry, Daddy-o, she’s busy with her girlfriend right now.”

Brinkman glares at her in a rage that could make him turn full werewolf at any second. “That’s what I was afraid of. I was about to order her to stay away and obey her patriarch and future husband—”

Taylor laughs at him contemptuously. “Tell her? Just the other night she was about to kill herself so she wouldn’t have to obey you and that filthy rich loser you’re trying to force on her just so you can have his money.”

“Suzanne, she’s committing treason—”

“It was kill herself, kill Ollie-Ollie, or this. I say she’s made the right choice. I say if she marries anybody, it’s Shira Thomas or nobody. That’s what I say, O patriarchal piece o’ shit.” She smirks at him triumphantly.

He glares at her. “Very well. I may have to disinherit her along with you. Fortunately, your eldest brother still knows his place in the order of things, and so does his daughter. I must arrange a more suitable alliance that will reinforce our power. Goodbye, you filthy whore. May your daughter’s corpse be the last thing you see when I come to eat you alive.” He abruptly cuts the call.

“Hmph! Keep fighting that lost cause, old cur. You won’t live to see it destroyed.” She switches to video of backstage incident at Bumbershoot, with unwilling Minty trapped in Shira’s arms. “Now I’d give anything to see Shira actually molest that girl...”

on to the next...

Back to Chapter 10 index...
Back to Chaos Angel Spanner table of contents...

Copyright © 2011 Dennis Jernberg. Some rights reserved.
Creative Commons License

[Revision 2, 7/30/11: Unchanged from the first draft.]
[Revision 3, 10/19/11: added new opening.]
[Revision 3.1, 10/25/11: added new final scene.]

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