Chaos Angel Spanner — Chapter 6: The Head and the Tail
Part 1: Throw the Gauntlet (Revision 3)
Part 1: Throw the Gauntlet (Revision 3)
I have just talked to God and he is a gay pro-abortion atheist.
Now prove that statement false.
Baron von Knifty
We are the champions...
Queen TIME WARNER CORPORATION.
Now prove that statement false.
Baron von Knifty
We are the champions...
3 september 2014.
a secret location. Rebel Styles tortures your dreams. The succubus looks down on you from every television screen in your world, taunts you, laughs at you, begs you to rape her. But you are protected and sustained in your absolute faith in the Holy Prophet Osama bin Laden. You are His weapon against the Great Satan. You are Ali Muhammad, the man from Jamaica, leader of Al-Qaeda in America.
You escape from Rebel Rebel’s torment only to find that someone has put a bag over your head and a hard ball in your mouth. He removes the bag. You see a man who is too pretty to be a man, his cold blue eyes drilling pitilessly into yours, a contemptuous smirk on his face. The accursed vampire who slew the Holy Prophet and drank his blood.
“We meet again, Billy Bates,” says Will Becket. “I apologize, but we had to keep you silent because we already know what you will say. You say it all the time, at the top of your lungs, without end. ‘Die, die, die.’ The Slasher Hunters tell us you and your crusaders have a special fondness for murdering women. You call it... R&R.” He puffs delicately on his cigar and blows smoke in your face. You glare back at him with absolute hatred.
“Now, I’ve studied the Holy Qur’an and the sayings of the Holy Prophet Muhammad myself. I was very surprised to find that the Holy Prophet saw the coming Day of the Lord quite differently from the way we were taught in Sunday school. Which is to say, that it is almost identical to what we learned about the Last Days in Sunday school.”
He leans closer to you and plays with his cigar. “You know who comes back when the end of the world is at hand? No, not the Prophet Muhammad.” He smiles wickedly and looks you in the eyes. “It’s Jesus.” He leans back, chuckles, and takes another drag from the cigar. “That’s right. The Holy Prophet of Islam proclaimed the Second Coming of Christ.”
The pretty man holds your face in his hands and locks your eyes with his. “Well, guess what. Jesus is already here. He is too great and holy to return in the form of a mere man. He returned as a nation. We await the Guided One in prayer.” He stands up, points down at you, and proclaims with absolute certainty: “Ours is the true Islam! Yours has been obsolete since 1776!” He laughs in triumph, believing he has vanquished you.
But you are but the instrument of the true Mahdi, Osama bin Laden, Lord and Savior of the world. You have sworn eternal vengeance against the blasphemers who worship the Great Satan. But all you can do right now is let the blaspheming bloodsucker laugh.
Mudlark House. Every morning, mother and daughter wake up together in the bed they now share in the house they now co-own, named after the mother’s nom de rock. Jennifer lies on her back and gazes deeply into the deep blue eyes of the woman she is pleased to call wife. Willa lies on her side, bare skin against bare skin, and caresses her daughter-wife’s breast. “Does Connor know about this?” asks Jennifer.
“Of course he does. When he agreed that we should marry, he knew what we’d be doing afterwards. I’m sure he’s having sweet fantasies about us as we speak.” Willa winks.
“Maybe we should let him watch.” They laugh together.
“You know I did this to protect you.”
“I know. But now that you’re my wife, I won’t let you just pleasure me like I’m still a child. We’re lovers now. You have to make hot passionate love to me, as much as possible.”
Willa laughs. “Well, then. Not even Drusilla’s evil guru powers can stop us from making this our extended honeymoon.”
Jennifer’s body goes taut with excitement. She giggles. “Let’s do it.”
They kiss hard and share tongues. Willa slides her hand down from Jennifer’s breast to her moist trembling cunt and slips two fingers in; then she mounts her and puts their cunts together and rocks her into escalating explosive ecstasy…
school district headquarters. “Mr Chairman,” says Peter Ross, Seattle Public Education Corporation CEO, “we are happy to say that someone has taken the Law into his own hands and eliminated the traitor who was attempting to organize a student union in Bremerton.”
Richard Becket stares down on Ross with disapproval. “But her more dangerous partner Karen Kubota remains a threat. As long as she still lives, the rabble can still rise up against us. We must constantly remind them that we are the head of this nation, and not the tail.”
“How did you know of Karen Kubota, sir?”
“She is the most open and active of the Richter-Thomas clan in your school system. Their family has fought against ours for generations. They refuse to know their place.”
“Kubota has been joined by the daughter of our enemy, the Teachers Guild leader. Her name is Shira Thomas.”
The Chairman frowns. “Shira Thomas is her cousin, but even more than that. Your plan may be in greater danger than you know.”
“One little pickaninny is nothing, Mr Chairman.”
Becket slowly shakes his head. After a pause, he says, “Don’t allow yourself to be complacent, Mr Ross. You will require a full briefing so that you will realize the full extent of the danger posed by this Shira Thomas. That is enough. Good day.” The Chairman’s image disappears, leaving Ross confused.
principal’s office. Principal Principal has his loyal teachers assemble in the meeting room behind the main office. “Ladies and gentlemen, it has come to our attention that despite the elimination of one of the student union organizers plotting sedition against Our Nation, the treason continues.”
“How can that be?” gasps Mrs Turnipseed.
“Nicolette Rosewater’s death has only doubled the determination of the more dangerous Karen Kubota,” Falconer warns. “Never forget that name. She belongs to the Richter-Thomases, one of the most criminal liberal families to ever wage jihad against Our Nation.”
The Principal says grimly, “America is a republic, not a democracy. We, the chosen ones of God, are the head and not the tail. We must do whatever we can to put an end to this democratic threat before it escalates into a full-scale insurrection.”
Mudlark House. Every morning, after they make love, Willa and Jennifer take a long luxurious bubble bath in a bathtub made for two and languorously caress each other’s skin. Today they cannot focus on simply enjoying each other. More urgent issues worry them. They talk business.
Willa asks, “Do you know what happened to your classmate Colette?”
Jennifer sighs. “We all loved her, especially Karen. From what I heard, two Slashers had their way with her. The timing looks awfully suspicious. I suspect Leila knows one of ’em.”
“Are you sure you’re not just putting yourself in more danger?”
“C’mon, love,” Jennifer reassures her. “I survived a whole island full of these creatures. Besides, I’m not facing them alone anymore. There’s a whole bunch of us willing to fight to make the Student Union work. Besides, we’ve got Shira and Karen.”
“I know Karen would never pass up a chance to fight for justice. But what you told me about Shira last night…”
“Colette’s murder hit her hard. It reminded her of what happened to Kira in the coup.”
“Are you really sure, then, that she’ll stick with the fight?”
“Don’t worry about Shira, darling. I know she’ll make the right choice.“ Jennifer winks. “It stands to reason.”
Shira’s apartment. Shira wakes up to find Dexter already awake and sitting up. She stretches out and rolls over to face him, sliding the covers off her naked body. “Couldn’t sleep? I bet you’re taking your work to bed, right?”
Dexter laughs. “Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’m always like this during football season.”
She laughs and cuddles up to him. “Did you know it’s my first year in school?”
He looks at her with surprise. “Really? How?”
“When your dad’s in a rock band and on tour, he hires a tutor. And then when you’re home between tours, you still got your tutor. Turns out I didn’t need school breaks, so I ended up graduating early. Like thirteen.”
“And you’re still doing high school sports?”
“That’s why I took the tutor deal. I can’t play with the big girls yet, so why not?”
“Damn, girl, you got a brain on you.”
She climbs up to sit on his lap and winks. “Damn right. Thanks for keeping me company, Dex.”
“I couldn’t let you suffer by yourself.” They laugh together. She rewards him by kissing him deeply on the lips.
At breakfast, Hope asks him, “So you’re saying you wanna marry her?”
“That’s what I’m hoping. I love her that much.”
Shira sighs. “Aw, c’mon, Dex, I’m only fourteen. I’m still way too young to even think of marriage.”
“I’m afraid she’s right, Dexter,” says Hope.
“You’ll have to be awful persistent if you wanna get me to the altar, like maybe, mmm, ten years or so.” She gets a mischievous look on her face. “Say, I hear you’re afraid of the Screen Gems logo.”
Dexter’s mouth drops open. “What? Get outta here!”
“I saw it on your face when we were watching Monkees reruns the other day. I bet when you were a little kid, you hid in the hallway just outside the living room and took a peek, and when The Flintstones was over, you closed your eyes, held your ears, and went ‘la la la’ to drown out the creepy tune. I bet if I ask your sister, she’ll be more than glad to tell me all the details.” Shira tickles him; he laughs helplessly. Hope rolls her eyes and facepalms.
Willa and Angela accompany Jennifer when she comes to bring Shira and Dexter with her to school; when they leave, Willa and Angela stay behind to have coffee and talk. “So why aren’t you guys on strike yet, Hope?” asks Angela.
Hope sighs bitterly. “It’s awful hard to go on strike when the chairman of the board also happens to be the head of the union.”
“So our old frenemy Pete’s still in charge,” Willa says. “Sounds perfectly oxymoronic, if you ask me.”
“Still, the Law agrees with Ross, Ross says we’re a glorified temp agency, and we don’t have the money to change it. Yet.”
“We can always pool our money and operate on less. We’ve done it lot so of times before.”
“But the Cartel”s got infinite amounts of money at their command, and they can even use the IRS to steal ours. They do it all the time.”
Angela says, “So we’ll have to place our hope on the kids, then, right?”
“Angie, you know as well as I do not to underestimate the kids.”
“And especially the girls,” adds Willa.
Angela peers at them skeptically. “Why, when they’re up against the entire system?”
Willa winks. “Because the system’s not suited for human beings, and especially not women. Sooner or later, it’ll drive them to the edge. After that, who knows what’ll happen.”
before school. One by one, they pass the security detail and through the front door: Shira, Jennifer, Karen, Polly, Cory, Kio, and Steve. Once inside, they huddle together to quietly discuss their plan. “They want us to surrender without a fight,” says Jennifer.
“We can’t give up,” says Karen. “We can’t allow ’em to win.”
“This is a Challenge,” says Shira. “Let’s throw it back in their faces.”
“We gotta do this, no matter what,” says Cory.
“For Colette,” says Kio.
“For Colette,” the others say together.
They form a straight line and walk side by side, through the gauntlet of personalized advotainment, past the principal’s office, through the cafeteria, toward the main hallway. They are ready when Charmian and Bart get in their way to stop them.
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Copyright © 2011 Dennis Jernberg. Some rights reserved.
[Revision 3, 10/1/11: Continuity tweaks and text corrections.]
[Revision 3.1, 10/22/11: Continuity, characterization, and text corrections.]